Sunday, June 27, 2010


Funny that something so simple like the sound of a Maggie sucking on an empty bottle is the best possible thing I could hear right now. I don't get to hear it often, but when I do it just makes my day because it means she finished her whole bottle. Earlier in the week I was hearing it quite often. And was so elated to hear at her Tuesday weight check that she had gained 3 ounces in 5 days! Woo hoo!

Then, funny thing, she stopped eating again. And the next two days were horrendous. I know it sounds like I'm always Debbie Downer but it was just so discouraging because I just had it as a goal in my head that we could make it a whole week of meeting her daily requirement. But it just didn't happen. Thursday's weight check showed she lost two ounces of those three ounces. Dum, dum, dum.

"It's okay," I told myself. "We can get back on track. We have before." Well guess who woke up with thick, green mucus running down her nose on Friday. Unbelievable. Mary Lawrence started summer camp this week and so she must have brought something home (why did I think summer meant Maggie couldn't get sick?). So now eating is even harder. And all I can think about is our checkup on Tuesday and if she lost weight the doctor is definitely going to push the G-tube. Again, it's so frustrating, because I know she can eat. If we lived in a perfect "Maggie World" of no distraction, no germs, no injured husband, no extracurricular activities, no reflux, I swear she would eat...

Oh and as far as the "injured husband" thing, poor Justin threw out his back again and Saturday morning he couldn't even move off the hardwood floor he was attempting to sleep on. After a trip to the ER and a desperate call to his mom to ask her to come help (because I can't seem to be able to take care of my two children, yet alone a husband that can't move) we are at the tail end of another fun weeekend at the Cordon household.

Anyways, sorry to be so depressing. It's generally not my personality, I promise. I really want to do everything with joy and love and good cheer. And I want to praise God for all circumstances. But today I'm kind of down about it all. It's not like I really wish we were on some fabulous summer vacation or at the pool most of the day like other families. I really don't care about those things. All I want is my baby to eat and for my family to be healthy and happy.

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