I left the hospital last night feeling so upbeat, finally letting myself feel excited that we might just be getting over this hump. I came back this morning to find Maggie not eating and having a temperature of 101. I am reminded once again how quickly things can change on this preemie journey and, frankly, I am angry about it.
I knew putting Maggie back in the hospital put her at risk for more viruses and germs. But I have santitzed her room with Lysol and clorox wipes and even brought my own swiffer wet jet from home bc it grosses me out that they use the same dirty water to clean the floors. I also made a big sign on her bed to "wash hands before touching me," and I have even have had to remind techs and nurses who didn't "foam in and out" (with the antibacterial foam) just how important it was to keep Maggie well. I know I can't protect her from every germ but I do wonder how many people I didn't catch not using the foam and if I could have done anything else? She is so sick and pitiful it makes me cry.
They are going to have to put the feeding tube back in her nose if she doesnt take the next bottle because they don't want her to get dehydrated. But putting a tube in when she is sick can increase chance of a secondary bacterial infection so that's upsetting, too.
I am so discouraged. Primarily I am worried about what kind of virus she has and praying it is not too bad. Secondly, I am worried about how this is going to affect her feeding and where this puts us after she is well.
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