We went to the pediatric cardiologist today who did an echo test and (surprise!) it was inconclusive. The good news is that Maggie's heart is perfectly formed and there are no issues with the chambers or the valves. The bad news is that she saw some things that she cannot explain. There are some bright lights on the heart which could mean a number of things:
1. it could be a sign of that something is wrong with the placenta and the heart is trying to overcompensate
2. it could be a sign that there are chromosomal abnormalities with the baby
3. it could be that the the lack of amniotic fluid makes things hard to distinguish and they could just be showing up on the screen like that because of this . When she does the test again in six weeks they may have disappeared completely.
4. it could be absolutely nothing at all.
So...what does one take from that? I could be terrified that something is wrong with Maggie, but honestly (and I never thought I would say this) I don't care. All I care about is that she lives and breathes. There are already so many risks and so much that could go wrong, that one more thing to be concerned about really doesn't phase me. Either God is going to let her live or not. We are asking for a miracle and that can cover a multitude of problems I am sure!
After thinking about this all afternoon it's funny to me that once again the supposed brilliant specialist has really no idea what's wrong or what's going to happen. I am so tired of doctors not knowing. And not being able to do one darn thing to help. They help so many people, why can't they help me?!
But I think God is showing me once again that really He is the only one who has control over this situation. He does not want me to put half of my faith in Him and the other half faith in the doctors. He wants me to put my complete faith in Him. Luke 18:27 says that "what is impossible with men is possible with God." To me that means that although the doctors may be powerless to do anything to help me right now, God is not. I truly believe that. And I am calling on Him to pour out His healing power on sweet Maggie right now.